Just a thought...

The greatest love is
Always act to serve others
Whilst knowing the Self

Funny how things shift...

Did not expect this-
To meet someone quite like you
Sweep me off my feet!

Grand Prix

Pumping grind fuel
Flag drops loaded for the race
Speeding dizziness

Clearer

I think I see
Why the shrouded cloaks
I think I understand
And find my way home

I need to know everything
To be good for You
I need to have all the words written
Before me

I think I see
If You can be that
Then I can be Yours too

Where I am

Shattered glass
Cracks appear far before the fall
Should I look at myself now?

Steeped in depths of feeling
Unknown sorts not defined
Is this out of context?

Twisted torture in the darkness
Such need not be
Yet the break away of the familiar
Keeps waking me at night

Such sleepless days cause my heart to explode
With unruly activity
Not that which is entirely true

Do I rein myself in?
Do I let myself go?

Cyclical years
A decade
Three
I am not the Master of me
I am not the Master

Shattered glass

Cracks appear far before the fall

Catching light in their cutting ways

Bleeding resistance is all that's left

Should I look at myself now?

Don't hurt me

Don't treat me the same
As I've had before
I need love too

Don't expect everything
And give me nothing
I need love too

Don't ask me to give my heart
If you're staying cold
I need love too

If I bare my soul
I am vulnerable

Please don't hurt me

Gracious desire

Silken webs glimmering
In the dusky creeps
Patches of light catching
Silver and blue
Lying on My back
Grass shards blowing like reeds
Over the Summer haze
And thoughts of You

Simple things as Nature envelops Her
Allowing and giving release
Dizzy spells from heightened heart beats
Fallen into present remembering
Dreams fantastical delight

Shan't tell them-
Against Vanilla skies of common decree

Homeward finding suggestive cues
Reside along the while
Ever missing - misunderstanding
That which is not I
Hopeless romantic
And surrender-
My wish beneath Your sky

Hello, You

You awoke
In a burning paperhouse
From the infinite fields
Of dreamless sleep

Sensual, tender, smooth
Sexual panther, beautifully cool
Hope remains with the ghost in you

No longer doubtful
Of what I'm living for
Invisible chains are those that weigh
Most heavily
And after all this time
I just hope you understand
My love

Inner Wisdom Gladly Speaks on Getting Found

I am here always
Falling into you not him
Get found through self love

Death to Self

Scary but I die
Each moment changes slowly
Loving free; let go
To become my ideal self
I must first kill who I am

About today

Pain inside
Anger
Also sadness
Feel like I did something wrong
Made all that effort
No reward
Want to cry
But can't
Stuck in public
Alone
Yearning for home
Safety
Comfort
Allowance of expression

You've got mail

Snailmail!
Sudden Excitement
Address Mrs B
Shit - Damn it all
Can't I start over yet?

$#@!

I don't know why it still shits me
You being such a stupid dick
Perhaps it's the simple fact you say one thing
And act another way
You're angry at me for the phone
But it's mine to do as I wish
And anyway I never was mean to you
You ungrateful little shit
Really I tried so bloody hard
To make your life easier
You can't even see it - even now...
Time goes by
And yet you act with such contempt
Drawing others to do your dirty work
It's not like I didn't tell you
Or let you know at all
In fact I was quite transparent
Clear
And kind
Sometimes kindness is being firm
Yes I'm frustrated
And you're still fucking up
Perhaps I made a good decision
Thinking - for me, you weren't enough?

Inner Wisdom Gladly Speaks on Love

If you seek you find
Spaces between us knowing
Love comes to itself

What is art?

Do I need that black barre
To be an perfect artiste
It's smirking snobbery at least
Sipping wine, operas and ballet
Fresh grass and peach bouquet
Eyes embrace the lasting feast
As with the critics we are released
Seemingly, we rest and believe the cliche

Why cannot art be free
Allowing it's own plight
The truth is we're fighting the system
Expressing our undying right
Fucking up the stanza's doesn't mean it's not art
Just means I'm a true artiste; creating from the heart

Screw you perfection.

To a higher love

Finally release
Broken dreams; new beginnings
It is about time!

Lonely Prince

You don't know me
Do you?

You don't see me
Like I see you.

How could you really see
When your eyes are closed
If you cry out you know best
Without anything opposed
How could you really see
When you're acting out of fear
Hiding in-between others views
And lying with wet bodies

Once upon a time
There was a lonely prince
And a lonely princess
To solve his emptiness
But in the changing scape came
One so powerful and strong
Pulled them apart
Until she walked away and shone

Where did he go?
That tired and lonely prince...

Where no-one can see him-
Professing he is free!

A fleeting thought

Silent
Slowly
Softly
Quietening breath

Waves
Wading
Washing
Falling into the blue deep

Likened to another dream
In colour; unlike a future goal
Trees with rustling leaves
Golden and red fires at dusk

Scattered

What a mess
Distracted thoughts
Think I said things that were
Misconstrued

What a mess
Procrastination rife
Should've Would've Could've
Might have done something else
But didn't

Tripping over my own humanness
Inadequacies of being alive
Making mistakes
Or just being me

Perhaps there are no faults
But my own over-analyzing brain
Thinking things that aren't true
Claiming things that are not as such...

What a mess
What a bloody awful mess
Messy head
Messy thoughts
Distracted

Just because I think you are cool!

Phoenix

Heat rising. Fire.
Droplets liquid nitrogen.
Rebirth through trials.

Lost in the wild

Damn it
Damn it
I'm doing it again
And it's not like I'm stopping myself

Getting carried away
Making things up
Writing the future
Just lost

Damn it
Where are you, Ro?

Cornflakes?

Scratching rusty nails
Medication inspires me
This blasted sore throat

Mornings!!

Bloody alarm radio
The 6 AM wake-up call
Apartment living

New found space

Something has changed here
Quite a nice feeling inside
I think it's freedom
There is no suffering now
Rather- space flows in my heart

Unexpected

I didn't quite expect
A night like this one
But yet it was still with good points
Nice to see myself being myself
And comfortable at last

See, I told you so

You'd never say that though
So it's just my Ego-
Talking to myself again

Rosy Cheeks

Blush, not just to swoon
The glass is empty
Tranquil vibes
And laughter with good friends

Another one?

Assessments

Finished
Tafe assessment
Word template design
Wish I got feedback
Should start my supervision essay

Caffiene Downer

Heavy eyelids low
Coffee last night a mistake
These consequences

Ah ha!

I think I've finally figured it out
That you always look to female teachers
For approval
I wonder what Freud would say about that
Perhaps you're stuck in a developmental stage
Or Erikson might think you're struggling in competence
Trying to see what your worth really is
And working hard at being "responsible", "good", and "right"

Regardless of the theories
I've noticed this in you
As it reflects on me I wonder whether
That's why you said you'd always do
Whatever made me "happy"
Instead of being yourself
With mistakes
Flaws
And authenticity!

That's all I wanted...

Maybe this is why you strive to follow others
And claim the beliefs as your own?
It is simply an observation of mine
And it makes a lot of sense
Why is it so important to you
To have that womanly approval?
I don't think you'll find out who you really are
Until you see that this is your motivation

How sad...

Here's to Honesty!

Oh God, it looks like i might be
Steeped into a unknown feeling
Crush, I think they call it
Alas he is far too young
Remembering my age

I think I need to re-evaluate
So instead i just sit back and enjoy the view

Here I am again with that feeling
Of flirtatious desire
That's the joy of being single - shame he's not 30!

Changing seasons

Welcome
Autumn arrives
Colder nights days
Shivering under bed sheets
Time to rediscover hot chocolate!